Bollywood comes out of the closet

People, get ready for the future coming out of Karan Johar!! For Tarun Mansukhani's Dostana preps you for just that, going where no Bollywood film has gone before. Not boldly though, the leading men of Dostana are just pretending to be gay, which seems to give them every right to behave like retards. This is the third Bollywood movie that critics seemed to like, which led me to believe that the movie would at least not bore me (Bachna Ae Haseeno and Rock On!! being the other two). But G and I could barely contain our yawns by the interval.

Sameer (Abhishek Bachchan, who desperately needs a shave) and Kunal (John Abraham, a sad convert to the Salman Khan school of fitness) are forced to play gay to find an apartment in Miami. Who would've thought that getting an apartment in the US would be tough these days, what with plunging real estate prices and all! But that would not serve the director's purpose, so we have these red-blooded, lady killing studs who pretend to be gay to share a condo with pretty girl Neha (a stunning Priyanka Chopra). Needless to say, both gays, oops guys, fall in love with Neha, who displays real bad taste by falling for her ugly boss (Bobby Deol). Much ado and a forced kiss later, all is well that ends well. Thank God for small mercies.

Bachchan is rather fearless here - he plays the effeminate man with surprising ease; Chopra is adequate. John Abraham lets his butt do the acting instead! The songs are peppy and fun, though John Abraham should stay away from dancing - he reminded me of Sunny Deol stomping around in Yaara O Yaara! Kiron Kher was over the top, but still managed to steal a laugh in the hilarious Maa da laadla sequence. Still, it was tough sitting past the interval. The self-referential nods to earlier Karan Johar films were irritating, at best! Did I mention that Johar should be coming out soon?

Verdict: Watch if it plays on TV.

PS: Watched Quantum Of Solace and liked it. Though I couldn't help feeling that Bond was turning out to be a lot like Batman with all the vengeance and guilt. Loved the action, thought I realised what inspired it when I watched The Bourne Ultimatum a few days later. Still, liked it better than the Die Another Day kind of disasters that came out of the Bond stable!